Alright, so I’m not sure if I’ve ever mentioned this on my blog before but… I love Naruto. I love Naruto so much. I’ve watched it since I was a kid on Cartoon Network and Toonami. My love for Naruto has never wavered, even though I stopped watching Naruto Shippuden in the middle of it. In fact, I loved Naruto so much that it pained me to watch the 4th Great Ninja war. I recently finished it and it brought me a lot of pain and anxiety, but I did it.
But what I want to do with you guys today is review the first episode of Boruto. I’ve never done a review before so we’re just gunna see how this works. And this is coming straight from the heart so be prepared.
The Official Review
IF THIS AIN’T SOME NONSENSE, THEN I DON’T KNOW WHAT IS. How did they— I’m honestly shook out of my life. I was so excited for the first episode and then the first thing I see is some ugly evil guy, talkin’ ‘bout some “I can take you to where I brought the 7th hokage.” WHERE??? Where did you bring him??? I must be mistaken. Can somebody PLEASE just… LOCATE this LOCATION on Google Maps for me. Donde esta??? Where???
I didn’t ask for this. I can’t believe in the very first episode of this series they told my weak little soul that MY BOY NARUTO D— THEY TOLD ME THAT— I—I can’t… I can’t believe the nonsense that I personally witnessed. They over there, talkin’ ‘bout some my boy Naruto died. WHACHU MEAAAAAANNNNNNN? Esta CONFUSED. HURT. But mostly— CONFUSED.
Can somebody please show me the list of people who tried to kill Naruto??? Maybe half the bad guys in the series, lol. So… Kishimoto is trying to tell ME that NARUTO got killed by some guy who looks like he just emerged from some trash compactor landfill??? You can’t be serious. Say it ain’t so. Like I said, if this ain’t some nonsense, then I don’t know what is. I truly don’t know. Honestly, truly.
And who gave my boy Boruto the Kakashi??? Who hurt him??? Who slashed my son’s son??? Let me find out. I’m a full-fledged shinobi starting today, okay. I’m going to the Leaf Village myself and somebody better come at me with the facts.
And why do bad guys like to be like, “Remember how I killed this guy that’s close to you? Hahaha.” I remember when MY BOY NEJI died and Obito was out there in those streets, talkin’ ‘bout some, “Look at your boy Neji. Why you tryna fight me? I just killed your mans.” And guess what happened to him? Obito died. Why didn’t anybody tell him??? Talk trash about the Uzumaki squad and you die, like, easy as that. I can’t believe the nonsense. Now Boruto REALLY gunna kill you.
Anyway, y’all can tell I’m heated. I’ve been talking about the same scene for ummm… all of this review, lol.
Okay, so, moving on.
So, my boy Shikadai has apparently been Boruto’s Day One, just like Shikamaru to Naruto. He’s just like Shikamaru; Shika my BOYYY. Can we just talk about for a quick second how Shikamaru always believed in Naruto??? Like, #SquadGoals. Anyway! They kind of made it seem like Shikadai was Boruto’s lil… butler or something? Like, no, let my boy Shikadai live for himself and occasionally help Boruto’s crazy self out, lol. But I like him. He seems good.
Soooo, this Denki kid. Boruto catches some kids in these streets messing with him and saves him. I thought, “Awwww, that’s cute, maybe they can be really close friends now.” But wait, hol’ up. This kid goes and gets bitten by a snake, smh. Orochimaru is that you??? And that snake turns him evil. Okay, I don’t have to give an entire play-by-play of the episode do I? Let me just tell y’all what’s on my mind. Is Denki the Kawaki guy at the beginning who said that Naruto caught those hands??? Is this another Tobi/Obito/Madara thing again??? Does he want us to think that Denki turns evil and later kills Naruto and fights Boruto? Tbh, it’s working, lol. And I didn’t read the manga, so maybe some of these are answered, idk.
And I’m sorry but… WHY DID HE MAKE THOSE KIDS SO UGLY??? Like… they’re supposed to be cute lil kids that make you go “aww” but the only “aww” I have is “aww, tragic.” When I first saw Boruto I was like, “…Dang, that kid is ugly.” And he made Naruto ugly too, with that “I just got out the military a few weeks ago” haircut. How did everybody in Team 7 glo’ up but Naruto, the main character? I’m confused. Hurt. But mostly confused.
AND WHERE’S MY BOY KAKASHI? What am I? Confused. Hurt. And what can’t I do? Go on. Somebody find my boy Kakashi.
And wait, if a snake bit that Denki guy… is that the work of Orochimaru? But like, I thought he “turned good” or something? I liked him for the first time at the end of Naruto when he was goofing off in the background, lol. And what’s up with him and Yamato? I read that he was spying on him or something but I’m not sure.
I thought this episode was okay. I’m not opposed to Boruto in anyway; I’m excited for the show. But if Kishimoto starts killing off the original squad, he can dial the number 1-800-THESE-HANDS. I’ll be sure to pick up.
If you’ve never watched Naruto, you should definitely check it out. Naruto is definitely a highlight of my life.
Thank you for reading this wild review!
P.S. I do not own any of these pictures; I got them off of Google! All credits to their original illustrators!